Nurturing Long Distance Friendships
I love the Holy Spirit. I am so grateful for the way he unites us, not just in spirit but also in our minds. When we decided on this topic, we had no idea the world would be in the state it is in. That we would be forced to do life apart, deprived from the human contact we all crave. But He knew. The Holy Spirit unites and connects us to one another when space and time cannot. He is the one that prompts a friend to reach out in our time of need and pray for us when we ourselves cannot find the words. A lack of physical connection does not have to mean our souls have to suffer as well. After all, it is not good for man, or woman to be alone.
Isolation vs. Godly Solitude
For years the devil had me believing that isolation is good for me. That my soul needed time alone. But the truth is, if this time is not spent in the presence of God, your soul is simply wandering aimlessly in the desert, ready to be tempted by the devil. We need godly solitude. Jesus often withdrew from his community to be alone with the Father and when we have the same attitude, when we are seeking God in our alone time, we will find Him. But when we cut ourselves off from the world to indulge in things of the flesh, it actually creates more distance between us and our Creator. Don’t get me wrong, squeezing in an episode of your favorite series here and there is good for your soul, but allow it to first find true rest and restoration in the throne room of God. Nurturing our relationship with the Father will naturally overflow in growth in every other area and relationship we care about.
Community, whether near or far, is important
Distance is such an easy excuse for broken relationships. “I moved away for college,” or “We moved away after we got married,” but community is not a suggestion, it is a command. The Holy Trinity: God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit, models community perfectly. As Christians we need to pursue this kind of unity, and interdependence. We know, the Holy Spirit connects our spirits, but we have to play our part when it comes to connecting our souls. We have to be intentional to stay accountable to one another, to be vulnerable with our weaknesses and praise each other’s strengths. It is possible for us to grow together when physical connection is prohibited.
Don’t be scared to reach out first
Fear, shame and lies from the enemy are all things that keep us from making the first moves, from picking up the phone when we need company and connection. We think it makes us look weak when we are the first to admit our needs. But guess what, people love to be needed. To know that their presence is valued in your life and that they are on your mind. This is how intimacy in relationships grow. And despite what the enemy tells you, you are just as valued in their lives. You are not a nuisance or a disruption within their day, but a pleasant surprise, a reason for them to take a break, to smile, to relax.
Keep it simple
As much as we want to reach out with a heartfelt prophetic message or an encouraging prayer, it is not a requirement to establish connection. A scripture, an inspiring quote or just a funny meme works wonders. Anything and everything is a good enough excuse to make an appearance in someone’s notifications. You don’t have to wait for an email from God with the exact scripture you need to send. Usually the funny meme that seems frivolous is precisely what they need. A simple pick me up. Because at the end of the day, the only thing that matters is that it came from you.
In the words of Fanny Bryce, “People who need people, are the luckiest people in the world”. I am grateful that God made me to need others, to need connection. Finding fun and creative ways to make contact can be a stress reliever in and of itself. Write letters, create memes or share funny videos. It is easy to sit alone in a corner and feel sorry for yourself when no one is reaching out to you. But it is better to give than to receive. Repent of pride, renounce shame and be the one to set the captives free.
How are you nurturing your relationships in fun and creative ways?
